I have a fascination with Pat Robertson. He just can't seem to shut his mouth for long, and every time he makes the news, it's just a bit more pathetic for Pat. I know some people think he's got a mental disorder or is in the thoes of early onset Alzheimers, but you would think that his PR people would either admit that he's speaking out of his ass, or just apologize and lock him up in his ranch bedroom. Neither has happened, so I'm taking it on faith that Pat has his full mental faculties and is just a fricking moronsky. His latest gaff:
"When you think of Jewish people, you think of successful businessmen. You think of people that are very wise in finance and who are prosperous. And when you think of poor countries around the world, you'd never would consider the nation of Israel. But in parts of the Jewish nation, poverty is growing at an alarming rate. Watch this.Obviously, this isn't blatent antisemitism, but it's there, it's hidden in his comments about Jews being 'thrifty' and good 'business people'. Can you say stereotype? If nothing else, poverty amongst the Jews is little different than poverty of any other ethnic group. We have a large elderly population living on fixed incomes, plenty of Russian immigrant families that have never caught on to 'the American way" of financial success, and there are enough disabled, sick, and just plain poor Jewish people out there all over the world, including Israel. Not everyone who is Jewish has a professional degree and makes a 6-figure salary. Thinking that they do is wrong. Pat is wrong. As usual.
It shocks people to hear that there's poverty in Israel. We assume Jewish people are very thrifty, extraordinarily good business people. There shouldn't be poverty there. What's the story?"
But that's not all. Pat has now claimed to have leg pressed 900 kilos. Yup, our man Pat is now an Arnold wanna-be. Interesting that exercise guru's claim that it can't be true. Pat and his minions swear that it is. OK. Clay Travis of CBS SportsLine.com called the 2,000-pound assertion impossible in a column this week, writing that the leg-press record for football players at Florida State University is 665 pounds less. Pat is claiming to have leg-pressed 2000 lbs, or 1 TON, in 2003. Pat is now 76 years old.
And there's more. Pat decided that in late may the world would be smote(d) (is that a word?) and there would be tsunamis and terrible storms on the American coasts, but not to worry, because FEMA is on the job. Yeah, that provides cold comfort, doesn't it? Pat actually said, He said, 'If I heard the Lord right, the coast of America will be lashed by storms this year.' I love that. If I heard the Lord right. What Pat, you weren't listening to the big guy, or were you mulittasking and leg-pressing thousands of pounds when G-d was talking to you?
More great Pat-isms from here:
What Pat Robertson said: "The Antichrist is probably a Jew alive in Israel today" (quote found in both Wikipedia's article on The Book of Revelation and "The Christian Paradox," Harpers.org)
What God said, if I heard him right: "I like being famous, but then you get your crazy fans, your stalkers, and they ruin it. You know who gets a lot of that? Shatner."
What Pat Robertson said: "I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: If there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected him from your city . . ." in reference to Dover, Pa., after eight members of the school board there who advocated teaching "intelligent design" failed in their bids for re-election. Intelligent design is a theory that posits that the universe is too complex to have evolved without divine intervention.
What God said, if I heard him right: "Intelligent design? For that you can't beat Restoration Hardware. I love it. If I didn't live in heaven, that's where I'd live, Restoration Hardware."
What Pat Robertson said: In 1998, concerning Gay Days at Disney, "I would warn Orlando that you're right in the way of some serious hurricanes, and I don't think I'd be waving those flags in God's face if I were you." (Author's note: Hurricanes did hit Orlando six years later. They also hit Florida during the 1500s, before the nylon rainbow flag, or nylon, was invented).
What God said, if I heard him right: "You know what I heard? 'Every day is gay day at Disney!' HA! That's funny. People are funny, although I prefer puppies, at least as pets. You know who can't tell a joke? Jesus."
What Pat Robertson said: On Jan 6 according to CNN.com, Robertson suggested that "Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke was divine retribution for the Israeli withdrawal from Gaza, which Robertson opposed." Robertson: "He was dividing God's land, and I would say, 'Woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course to appease the [European Union], the United Nations or the United States of America,' " and "God says, 'This land belongs to me, and you'd better leave it alone.' "
What God said, if I heard him right: "I said, 'Pat, get a tape recorder, they're like $30 at Staples.' Does he hear that? No. People have selective hearing. It's a fact."
What Pat Robertson said: "You know, I don't know about this doctrine of assassination, but if [President Hugo Chavez of Venezuela] thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it." (Robertson later apologized).
What's on God's mind, if I understood him at all: "That kind of thing depresses me. It's like throwing a party, and you have nice wine and food and flowers, and some idiot just has to pick a fight. There are so many other things to do. I'm thinking about going on MySpace. But I don't have a single good picture of myself. People think I'm invisible, but I'm just not photogenic. You know whom I look like? Angelica Huston. Ha! I wish! That's funny, you believed me. It happens all the time." Stumble It! JBlog Me