I feel the weight of the world upon me
I'm a financial wreck, but what else is new? My kids are going to have a very sparse holiday, but they know and expect it, so we're just dealing with it. My horrible job that I hated more than life itself is over, thank God, and the nutty boss never even made the effort to say "thank you" for all that I did. It didn't surprise or upset me, because it's so typical of him, but geesh...
School is going well for both kids. Tomorrow is the Boy's big holiday party and I'm to make a vat of cranberry sauce for it. Easy as pie and quick. No problem there. The Girl will be attending, and then I have a cardiologist appointment right afterward so (sob) no sugar at all for this girl. It's SO not fair! But if I eat sugar and she tests my blood sugar as I know she will, I'll get yelled at. So I won't, even though there will be cheesecake and all sorts of homemade cookies and candies. I'm taking a doggie bag home for after the appointment because I am very bad. Yes, I am.
The weather has been unreal. Never can I remember a mid-December day where all I need to wear is a polar fleece hoodie. This is just like winter in the Bay area. I just wish it would stay this way, but eventually it will snow and I will feel sad until I go out at night in a snowstorm and walk the neighborhood. Then I will cheer up for I love the smell and sound of a snowstorm, the silence broken only but my breath and the crunch of my boots on the packed powder. I'll make hot chocolate and we'll drag the sleds off the front porch and slide down our enormous hill and hope we don't end up in the street. It will be OK. I will make it through the winter and come out of it in spring feeling like pioneer woman.
But in the meantime I am sad and I'm not sure why. I just keep making tears that silently well up in my eyes and roll down my cheeks. I will perk up and regain my sense of the absurd. But for now, it's cranberry sauce and getting dinner on the table. No more Huff for a few days though. I can't take the emotional toll. Stumble It! JBlog Me