Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

email: margalitc at yahoo dot com

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Saturday, December 02, 2006

Ooooo, I hate that kid!

You know, that incredibly annoying kid in the movie The Polar Express. The know-it-all kid that just doesn't seem to get how to relate to the other kids? The one that knows just way too much trivia about every topic but doesn't get that he's really annoying? You know that kid? Well, I live with him. Yeah, that's my Boy all right.

Ok, the Boy isn't nerdy and doesn't have a horrible voice and taped glasses, or even yellow planet pajamas, although I've been threatening him with some for Hanukkah. But he's got that know-it-all, let me tell you all about what kind of train we're on attitude that drives me bonkers at times. It's not that he doesn't have friends or isn't able to relate to other kids. It's that he just doesn't always get when to keep his trap shut and stop sharing useless information. For example, at the very end of The Polar Express, when the elves are partying and they have the Steven Tyler look-alike elf in the elf-Areosmith band, the boy is all disgusted because they show elf Joe Perry playing a Stratocaster, and lord knows, Joe Perry doesn't really play a lowly stratocaster. It was WRONG. So we had to hear all about what Joe Perry really plays and why the Stratocaster is absolutely the biggest mistake in the history of film.

I'm telling you, this is one very annoying kid at times. You should sit down with him during Wheel of Fortune. His disgust over contestants that can't guess the puzzle in two seconds is legendary in our home. He has no patience for lesser mortals. He thinks that everyone should be able to win the million dollar prize on Millionaire. He thinks that Ken Jennings is NORMAL, for heaven's sake. He finds mistakes in every TV show and movie he's ever watched. He can wax forever on the CGI merits of a film, telling how they did every freaking special effect. It's daunting how trivial his mind is. And this is coming from the Queen of Triva, the Empress of Minutae. I promise you, he's 50 times worse than I ever was.

It's been such a long day. I can usually handle it if I get time off. But when I've got sick kids home for almost the whole week and haven't had one second to myself, I get very weary. Crabby and weary. Bitchy, crabby and weary. Yeah, that about sums it up.

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Blogger MyBlogCanBeatUpYourBlog(.com) said...

All he needs to do is hurry up and reach legal age, go on a plethora of game shows, and bring home that money.

Sounds like a good plan to me.

2/12/06 2:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds actually like any kid his age. I have lived through a couple so far. Got a couple more to go..........

3/12/06 9:18 AM  
Blogger Gidge said...

Mine is suddenly very well informed about "what people do" and that everything I do is apparently "not what people do".
Who are these people?
How has he met people I don't know? He's 4....

3/12/06 2:52 PM  
Blogger Kris said...

Hey, I have that kid too! Mine's only four, I can just imagine what he'll be like at 12

3/12/06 5:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My 10 year old son checks out the Guiness Books of World Records from the school library and then reads them out loud, all the time. He reads those Usborne and DK books that are just chock-full of information about dinosaurs and mummies and the ocean. Oh, and now he reads the Star Wars Wikipedia too. He knows a little something about pretty much everything!

4/12/06 9:05 AM  
Blogger Belinda said...

He would RULE at that MTV game-show where they pit movie-nerds against each other. It's HILARIOUS.

7/12/06 6:57 PM  

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