Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

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Sunday, August 19, 2007

Big Brother 8-Crazy Reality TV at it's Finest

We're about half way through the Big Brother 8 season and again, I'm hooked. This show hooks me in like no other reality show for a variety of reasons. It's on 3 times a week plus you can follow it 24/7 on the live feeds. I don't get the live feeds, but I do read Jokers Update at least once a day to follow the trials and tribulations of our houseguests. Of course, I'm rooting for Evil Dick and his equally smart but evil daughter Danielle. Dick is one of the best players ever. If he, Dr Will, and Mike Boogy were ever in the house together, can you imagine the total and complete chaos that would take place? They're three of a kind, those evil houseguests.

Of the players who are left, Jamika by far is the most annoying, Praise God. She's such a hypocrite, and such a mean woman riding on the back of Jesus. If I hear her say one more time that Dick is going to hell for not taking Jesus as his personal savior I'm gonna reach through the TV and grab her shitty ugly throat. And all the time Erik keeps his mouth shut. He's Jewish. Didn't she get that her constant Jesus talk is HURTFUL to him? Why no, she doesn't. She's gotta go.

And (sob) Amber (wahhhhhh) (sob) (sniffle). Oh my god, how did this woman pass the psychological screening? She's a mess. She cries over everything. She's an ex-crackhead. She swears on the head of her daugher a bit too much for my my taste. She's dumb as a box of rocks. I can't wait for her to disappear behind the 'garden' on the way to Julie's 'guesthouse' which of course is all in one studio and looks faker than crap.

The second tier of Must Get Evicted houseguests include Jessica, Eric, and Jen. Jessica, I gotta ask. Do you comb your hair with an eggbeater on purpose? And that voice! Have you taken lessons in practicing like a whiney 5-year-old for a long time now? Jessica is another dumbell. I can't figure out how she ever got out of high school. She sits and ponders for hours, and then always comes up with the solution either Dustin (z"l) or Eric put in front of her face. Evidentally she missed "Thinking on Your Own 101" in college. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Eric is America's Choice guy. How they picked him is beyond me. Maybe it's the evil arched eyebrow he exhibits as they give him the secret card to read in the diary room. Cause that's one creepy face he puts on. I don't get Eric. The pierced nipples throw me. Is he gay? Is he straight? Is he just weird? The fauxhawk haircut makes him look demented. He lies like a rug, as we all know, and he has cozied in to Jessica of the empty brain for his 'love interest'. Maybe that's because she's so dumb she doesn't even bother to notice now that Dustin (z"l) is no longer a houseguest. Of course Dustin was as out and proud as them come, but maybe she was planning to change him. See, Dumb Dumb Dumb.

And then there's Jen. Jen is smart. Jen is manipulative. Jen is slightly psychotic. Jen has a borderline personality disorder. She likes to put her name on everything. She's a Jenius. She belongs to Jensa. Oh lordy, those sayings are annoying. Jen has a great chance of winning this game. She's been on the hot seat 3 times and has survived. She's the houseguest that cannot get the hint to leave. So she's going to be backdoored this week. There's a deal going around. If it works, and with Evil Dick in charge, it will, we'll be saying Goodbye to Jen in a few days.

The leaders are, as I've mentioned, Evil Dick and his daughter Danielle. Dick is a 42 year old kid. He works in rock and roll, but we're not quite sure what he does. He's heavily tattooed, has excellent red streaks in his spiky hair, many piercings, and totally looks the part of Rock n Roll dude. He's incredibly smart and manipulative. He's profane to the point that he is bleeped a bit too much. He farts, he burps, he gets right into people's faces and tells them off until they cry. He's totally scary, but he's a nice guy underneath it. The scary is a great act. He loves his daughter, he'll protect her ass, and all the other houseguests are just there for his enjoyment. I love him. I think he's brilliant and PERFECTLY cast for a houseguest from hell.

Danielle is a little slip of a girl. She's so pretty that you think it must be fake, except she's just 21 years old She's very bright too, and has an amazing endurance. Between Dick and Danielle, she's the brawn, he's the brains. But she's not a typical brawny woman. She's tiny with arms so little they look like twigs. Maybe she weighs 95 lbs. No matter, she wins competition after competition because she's got a will that can't be beat. She's got a good act going. It's the "He's my father but I can't control him, don't blame me for what he does" rant. She does it with tears. She's good. But she's plotting along with Dick all the way to the bank.

Zack. Oh yeah, Zack. He's a wildcard player. He's very buff, he's very quiet, he seems to be siding with Dick and Danielle, but you just can't tell with this kind of player. He's too quiet, too easy to get along with, and he rarely speaks his mind. I'm always on the lookout from when he's going to break through and become an A-list player. I imagine that it will happen once we get rid of (alevai) Jamika, Jess, Eric, and Jen.

If you don't watch BB, you gotta try it. It's a psychological study in young, self-absorbed, slightly whacked people shoved together into a house with no exits, no internet, no tv, no news at all for the summer. What happens ON the tv is interesting, what happens during the feeds is just plain trainwreck funny.

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Blogger Shan said...

Oh I love Big Brother. I do enjoy Evel Dick, but only to a point. His attacks are sometimes too personal for my liking. That being said I'll miss him like crazy when/if he gets the boot. He is very good TV.

19/8/07 4:47 PM  
Anonymous jen said...

Dead-on analysis! I'll simply add as much as I loathe Amber, I almost hate to see her go because A) she's unintentionally hilarious and B) she's REALLY going to lose it once she gets back to reality and see how much viewers dislike her.

19/8/07 11:48 PM  
Blogger Not a Granny said...

I have loved BB since inception. But, I disagree on one little point...Amber has got to go home this week. I don't really think I can stand one more week of her crying in the Diary Room!!

found you at Simply Sassy weekend bloggers!!

20/8/07 10:29 AM  

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