Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

email: margalitc at yahoo dot com

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Sunday, October 07, 2007

Whose Fault is it Anyways?

Here I am in my usual guilty posture, knowing that my health is yet again directly affecting the Boy's behavior. I honestly don't know what to do. What I do know is that my health isn't great, I'm not bouncing back from my hospitalization like I have in the past, and I don't feel very well most of the time. I'm taking my medicine like I'm supposed to do, and I'm living the totally sedentary lifestyle I've been ordered to practice. However, I'm having my usual trouble with insomnia, which adds greatly to the problem. If I don't sleep, I don't eat correctly, and I'm grouchy. By saying I don't eat correctly, I don't mean that I eat a lot. Quite the opposite, in fact. I don't eat at all. My stomach aches constantly, that ache you got when you pulled all nighters in college. Sour stomach. Nausea. It sucks. So I don't want to eat, which gets my blood sugar going wacky and I end up drinking soda to pull up my blood sugar and soothe my stomach.

Pleasant, huh?

I get all antsy about not sleeping so I take an Ambien and sleep for 15 hours. This isn't even better than not sleeping at all, because I'm in coma sleep for a full day. It's not good either. When I am sleeping the sleep of the dead, life goes on at my house and I'm not awake to supervise it. Mostly it means that the Boy eats everything in sight, lays around and makes huge messes, and spends too much time on the computer. The Girl finds things to do and leaves the house to hang with friends. She's also messy, but nothing compared to Sir Slob. Which brings us to today's sad tale.

I'm out sawing logs upstairs and the boy decides that it's prefectly fine to eat an entire TJ's frozen dinner (family size) all by his lonesome. Fortified with food, he then decides that it's just A-OK to go onto my Amazon account and purchase a DVD RW external drive. With MY money. And not with my permission. Aaargh! I cancelled the order immediately, because honestly, do I really NEED a DVD RW? No, I don't. He wants one because he downloads movies all the time and stores them on his external HD, but that means he has to watch them on (sob) the 19" computer monitor, and not on the HDTV. Wow, what a tough life, huh?

Where the F does this child come from?

The punishment? Oh, the usual. He has to clean up the huge mess he made all over the house, he has to empty the dishwasher and then reload it with the dishes he's used today, he has to clean the kitchen to shiny perfection, and then he's off the computer for a week. But he never learns from his mistakes and I promise you, starting tomorrow he'll start begging to get on the computer. Begging constantly, trying to break me down. It's his MO.

Oh, and did I forget to mention that he didn't sleep at all last night, so he's been up for 2 days. Can you say Mania? I know I can.

Yes, the call is already in to his shrink.

Will this ever end?

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Blogger JaniceNW said...

Oh cripes AGAIN? Wow, he might need some serious work to do with meds. It hasn't even been a month since he was manic has it? I'm sorry and I don't have any easy solutions but you always have my support and I'm here if you need me.

8/10/07 1:15 AM  
Blogger madamspud169 said...

I have problems with eating food & diabetes too. I can go for around a week without eating & it sends my blood sugars either crashing low. I make myself drink cups of hot, full fat cows milk with honey to help my levels stabilise, this also lines my stomach which helps with the stomach cramps. I also drink high energy or glucose drinks such as red bull or lucozade these really help to raise my sugar levels.
Meal replacement drinks are good too even the diet drink meals are good as they're full of vitamins & things.

Thats some of the ways I manage my sugar levels when I'm not eating at all for a couple of days, I hope I've given you a few ideas.

8/10/07 11:11 AM  

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