Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

email: margalitc at yahoo dot com

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Monday, January 21, 2008

It's about more than Uncle Dick and the twins

Today Julie of MotherGooseMouse is being honored with her own virtual baby shower. Moms of boys have been asked to post about what it means to mother a male child, and what challenges and joys being the mother of a boy brings.

When I found I was pregnant with twins, I was really into having two girls. I wanted daughters (lordy, I was insane) in the worst way. I mean, I'm a girl, I know about girls...boys were scary. I didn't know how I was going to be able to raise a boy, so when I found that I was having one, I wasn't exactly thrilled. But my cousin took me aside and told me something that has been absolutely true throughout my 15 years of mothering a son. She said, "Boys always love their mothers." At the time I thought she was delusional, but she was so right. Boys, or at least my son, is incredibly loving. He snuggles and hugs and tells me he loves me every single day. He doesn't hold a grudge like SOME children in my family.

I've been reading many of the other posts for Julie, and so many of them are written about babies, but I want to tell Julie about what it means to have an older son. When your son reaches the teen years, they share with you things that you never knew about them. In addition, they share interests that you tried desperately to pretend weren't happening, like memorizing the entire 9 years of Seinfeld episodes and relating them to pretty much everything. My son likes to share activities with me, especially cooking. He's become a great cook, and he's often the one that volunteers to make dinner.

Boys are slobs, but girls are so much worse. Teenage boys aren't known for their excellent hygiene, and yet the will clear up their messes while their female counterparts sit there waiting for turn down service.

Boys love to argue. They want to correct everything you say, they want to be right, they like to compete. Girls like to yell and sulk and take everything personally. Boys look at things more globally, and they don't get angry for long. The desire to be right is very important, and yet they apologize when they've started trouble with their competitive nature.

Boys will wear the same underwear for days and be clueless as to why mommy is grossed out by this. Boys NEVER do their laundry until they have not one stitch of available clothing, no matter how many times you nag them.

Boys are hilariously funny. They have a daredevil attitude on the outside, but on the inside they are more cautious than girls. Boys have such great friendships, with no drama and no gossip. They are easy on each other. They like to pay boardgames and tease each other on every round.

They love love love to eat. The amount of food that you will buy each week, only to be consumed before you have a chance to cook it is frightening. Boys will open the freezer, take out some burgers and make them 45 minutes after you've finished dinner, claiming they're starving. They drink gallons of milk and eat entire boxes of cereal on one sitting. They eat 24" subs for a meal and then want dessert.

Because they love to eat so much, they love mommy's cooking. Even if you're not the greatest cook in the world, they'll say you are. They brag to their friends about what a great cook you are, and you end up cooking for crowds of starving boys.

Boys are excellent. My cousin was so right. Boys always love their moms.

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Anonymous bethany actually said...

Aw, what a great tribute to your son, Margalit!

My mom claims that when I was little, I used to say I wanted to grow up to be a mom and have four sons. I don't know about four, but I do I hope I have a little boy someday.

21/1/08 7:29 PM  
Blogger daysgoby said...

See, this post gives me hope - that someday the glimpses I get of a really neat little kid busy growing up will turn into a really, really neat teenager.

Thanks, M! Today I needed that.

21/1/08 8:11 PM  
Blogger mothergoosemouse said...

Margalit, I love this post. You've reminded me of all the fun memories I have of growing up with a younger brother. Thank you!!

21/1/08 9:04 PM  
Blogger Limmud Southeast said...

You got that one right! Luv my boys.

22/1/08 10:30 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

I am currently pregnant with my first child---a boy.

I enjoyed this post!


23/1/08 2:49 PM  

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