How dish washing has created WW3
The Girl is tasked with this chore. That sounds simple, right? Oh no, so so not right. See, she barely eats here and so she has decided that she should only wash the dishes that she wants to wash.
Conversely, the Boy eats constantly and leaves dishes all over the house. On a daily basis he might use 6 to 10 plates, 5 or more glasses, pots, pans, and even baking dishes. He cooks a lot, and he leaves a horrible mess. If he makes ramen, little pieces of noodles are always left on the stovetop to burn. If he makes pasta, little pieces of the dried pasta end up on the kitchen floor. Things boil over and he never wipes up the spills. He opens cans and jars, packages and wrappers and leaves them where he opened them. He is the consummate slob.
So, I don't blame the girl for being so pissed off about the dishes. I feel the same way. No matter how clean the kitchen gets, if he steps foot in it, it's filthy in minutes.
So lately I've decided that he needs to wash his own dishes.
Hah! I am delusional.
This is how he washes dishes. Just tonight I brought him downstairs about 4 different times to get the kitchen cleaned up. He hems and haws and has to sit down because his knee hurts, blah blah blah. I finally get so fed up I lost my temper and told them that nobody leaves the house until the kitchen is clean.
They start screaming at each other. She's pissed, he's put upon, the dishes aren't getting done. I raise the ante with another promise of punishment.
He goes into the kitchen, runs the water, puts on the dishwasher that is almost totally empty, spills water all over the floor, and runs up the back stairs. He claims he's going to sleep.
I get him downstairs and scream at him, and he relents and washes like 4 dishes. Up the back stairs he goes again.
The Girl is beside herself. Once again she's left washing his dishes. But it's her JOB. She's had this one particular chore for years. I don't ask much of my kids, but the dishes are sacrosanct. They MUST be done, and often he or she will wash half the sink and leave the rest. It drives me criminally insane. My eyes turn red, my veins pulse, I want to bang their heads together.
The Girl will do a half-assed job, refusing to do the utensils and knives at the bottom of the sink. She won't wash out the recycling jars and cans. She lines them up on the side of the sink. I think she believes the recycling fairy will drop in and rinse them all and put them in the bin. I believe she's delusional, too.
She hates the smell of bleach and because we have the crappiest old cheap laminate countertops, bleach is the ONLY product that cleans them well enough. Or at least Comet with Bleach. It's the only harsh chemical cleaner we use, but nothing else works. She won't use it. She will, if pressured (screamed at) wipe down the counters, but she will not clean them. Nor will the Boy. He figured out that if she won't do it with smell aversions, he can claim that bleach makes him want to vomit. Voila! Nobody does it. So I have to.
Now, you think that at some point I would ask for help in getting the dishes done. For 3 fucking years every family counselor we have seen has solely focussed on this issue. I mean for me it's a make or break thing. I can live with their abject slovenliness, but I CANNOT live with a dirty kitchen. We have had therapists with years of experience give up because we cannot solve this problem. It's that bad. I've got two stubborn kids, and I'm stubborn myself. They do not want to do it, and I require it.
Oh, and yes we have paper plates, paper bowls, paper cups, and plastic utensils. Guess who uses them? That would be me. They don't LIKE them.
I swear it, if I make it another year it's gonna be a miracle.
Teenagers are worse than toddlers. Yes, they are! And if you don't believe me, you can borrow mine for a week. Or trade. I'll take toddlers any day. Stumble It! JBlog Me