Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

email: margalitc at yahoo dot com

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Sunday, August 31, 2008

Things change, things stay the same

Weekends are tough. School vacation is tougher. Put them together and we have some seriously conflicted kids and one mom on a very short rope. Fighting has been fierce these past few days, and there seems to be little signs of a truce until....

school starts.

Then all will be OK again. Hopefully.

I am exhausted beyond anything I've experienced in my life. I've worked 48 hours in a row and I just can't do it. I've tried. I really have tried. But all I do is work and sleep. It's not healthy and it's making me so short-tempered and angry that I'm impossible to be around. This level of trying to cram in my entire life into a few short hours/day isn't possible when I'm so exhausted. This weekend I slept 14 hours on Saturday and today another 12. I'm dragging. Nothing is getting done but work and sleep. Nothing. I haven't cooked a meal, I haven't cleaned or did laundry or done virtually anything other than work and sleep.

I knew when I took this job what it would vastly affect my quality of life. I just didn't realize how much it would affect my health. Sitting for so many hours at the computer has caused my edema to ramp up, which affects my breathing and makes me even more tired. It's a vicious cycle that I can't control.

I'm not working tonight, and I've spoken to the "boss" about the hours and we're going to try and adjust them in the next week or so. It's just too much for me. I feel like such a failure, especially after the constant harangues of "everyone can work if they want to." Well, everyone can't work a full time job, even if they DO want to. And I want to. I like this job. It's vastly entertaining, even when it's boring. I don't think I've ever had a job where I've learned so much about human nature in such a short time.

So work is on hold until we can figure out a better time schedule and get it approved. I'm still on board, but it could a while till I get back online. Which is really GOOD news for me, as we have a lot on our plates with school starting this week.

Reading has not been going well for the kids. The Girl has read absolutely nothing, which is no great surprise. The Boy finished (today) Fahrenheit 451, which is required of every kid in the school. I will have to read it out loud to the Girl for her to get it done in time for Thursday. As for the other 2 books they were both required to read....well, not my problem!

Pepper is growing like a weed. She's long and skinny and kinda nuts. She has a couple of really strange things that make her very unique. First, she has a very long tail and often curls it up over her back like a Spitz dog. It's so funny looking. She also is a total licker. She will lick and lick and lick me until I can't stand it anymore. Last night she got under the covers with me and snuggled down my my thighs. She started licking one, than the other leg, than moved up to try and lick my navel, which I am not fond of, then moved on to my stomach, arm, and tried to get into my face to lick my chin and nose. I can't stand the licking on my face. CREEPY. But she will lick and lick for the longest time. Not so much kneading, just licking.

Worthless Pet is feeling much better now, and has taken a bit of a shine to being Pepper's big brother. I wouldn't go so far as to say he actually likes her, but he plays with her and he no longer resists when she gets up in to his face. She's so persistent that I guess he gave up in disgust. Their favorite game is for him to get under the glass coffee table and for her to sit atop it and then they pretend to attack each other. It's pretty funny to watch.

My heart goes out to the people of the Gulf Coast as we all await Gustav's arrival. There is nothing I can say or do, nothing anyone can say or do that will make this storm suspend it's path towards New Orleans. I do pray that the evacuation saves many lives of both people and their pets, and that the government has learned the harsh lessons of Katrina and will be more prepared for the upcoming storm.

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Blogger Daisy said...

Take care. You have so much going on; it's overwhelming sometimes. That crazy cat! If she makes you smile, she's worth having.

1/9/08 3:24 PM  

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