Name: margalit
Location: Massachusetts, United States Professional writer, educational advocate, opinionated ultra liberal mother of 18 year old twins, living life in the slow lane due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, congestive heart failure, and diabetes.

email: margalitc at yahoo dot com

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Thursday, November 13, 2008

Growing up isn't always fun

Today the Boy came home from school and announced that he had a sucky day and he would appreciate it if I kept that in mind when dealing with him. Fair enough, since I had my own version of a sucky day, and in addition was in pain where I had my flu shot yesterday. I felt crapola and so did he.

He went upstairs for a bit and then asked if he could bring his hard drive downstairs to watch a movie on the big TV. Late afternoon TV consisting of Dr Phil and Oprah, I said sure. Any movie has to be better than those two.

He set up his hard drive and choose Kung Fu Panda to watch. He asked me if I would sit and watch it with him, but I'm leaving in a few minutes for a meeting and didn't want to commit to a movie just then. Besides, Kung Fu Panda? Um, didn't we outgrow such movies a long time ago?

We no, we haven't. Not in this house, anyhow. Both of my kids are huge fans of animated movies. Good ones like Wall-E and Finding Nemo are played over and over ad nauseum. They use them for "nap movies" where they know they'll drift off after 20 minutes of the movie and have a lovely nap while I get sucked into watching the damn movie. Every freaking time!

When a new animated film comes out on DVD my son is the first one to go on his secret download site and get the movie. He has a lot of movies. Way more movies than anyone could actually watch. His Disney collection is legendary amongst his friends, and they actually get together, this crazy bunch of teenage geekage, and watch Disney movies all night long.

What I've discovered is that when things aren't going that well for the Boy, he turns to these movies as a sort of comfort item, like an adult blankie or stuffy. Not that he still doesn't have his stuffy, because he does. But when things are rough, watching a simplistic movie with adorable characters, great sing-along songs, easy plots and a lot of laughs makes things a little lighter for him. Usually he's a fairly dark sort, but he visably lightens up with the animation carries him away.

Growing up is hard. Being a teenager is so filled with conflicting emotions. There's a girl... and it isn't going well. There are friends that don't get along. There are projects to do, driving to learn, growing up to do, drama and more drama, and for teenagers there is so much going on just socially that they fill up to the brim and need to release their emotions. They chose a lot of ways to do that: drinking, drugs, sex, food, anger, stupid dares. My kids often watch movies that are made for kids. I'm OK with that. Even if I do get sucked in every damn time.

OK, I admit it. I like the movies too!

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Blogger Daisy said...

I'm glad he has a way to retreat and let himself heal. My 16-er listens to his old favorite music, including holiday classics. Last time he was feeling really down he put in the Randy Travis Christmas CD.

13/11/08 8:02 PM  

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